Ptooie

This is me being completely happy.
I have time to spend with the turtle, time where im not completely distracted and only half listening when i need to be paying attention.
I can finally give the attention that i want to give.
Bliss.
This is me having time to spend creating - which i am, but nothing comes out quite like i want it to - not even bearable as in 'ok its not quite how i pictured it but its still great'
its more like ' crap that is SO ugly its totally unsalvageable i can't even PRETEND its art'
This is me being completely annoyed that my friends have invited themselves over and boy could i wait to see them.
We've been together too much the past couple months - its all been at my house and i am perfectly ready to have my personal space back and have it be personal space again.
But
No.
Fuck.
I don't FEEL like sharing a bathroom again
I don't feel like reminding anyone to flush or to cap the toothpaste or to fix the mat that they kicked or anything else that irks me about the bathroom.
I don't feel like sighing at a sinkful of dishes and nobody willing to do them but me
I don't feel like laughing at NOTHING i want a fucking joke if i'm gonna laugh.
Giddy idle giggles i'm not in the mood for.
My office space is pristine
Not a paper out of place, not a fiber of the carpet out of place.
Its great, just the way i like it, neat, waiting for me to be productive.
I don't feel like being woken up a minute before i need to be up by someone answering their fucking cellphone too early.
I don't feel like sharing my bed, my stuff - seriously - past 8 who shares a fucking hairbrush, pack your own damned brush.
I don't want to play nice.
I'm great with using my indoor voice and packing my crayons back but man, sometimes i seriously don't work well with others.